Let’s Be Real
January 1, 2022

Let’s Be Real

It’s been a really tough couple of months. It’s hard for me to say that because, like most strong, resilient, capable women I know, my default mode is to just put on a confident face, suck it up, and get to work. 

But, lately, I find myself craving authenticity and I’m frustrated that we seem to be living in an era where everything is misleading. 

Brands pretending to be things they’re not. Hypocritical companies saying one thing while doing another. Marketing hype (“we care about our customers!”) that couldn’t be further from the real customer experience. Politicians (on the right and left) who flip and flop so fast that it’s hard to know that they actually believe in anything (other than getting elected). Leaders whose words say they care about people but whose choices say otherwise. Influencers who are really just hawking products to get paid. Social media posts that are actually just ads

A lot about our economy and our society feels like a giant bait-and-switch. It’s no wonder we don’t trust our government, politicians, business leaders, or each other.

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But, lately, I find myself craving authenticity and I’m frustrated that we seem to be living in an era where everything is misleading.

I don’t know about you, but I’m tired of it. 

I want to be known. Fully known. Not for who I want you to think I am or who I think you will like or find agreeable. But for who I really am. Deeply. Truly. At my core. 

I want to know you. Not the facade on Facebook of smiling selfies, witty tweets, or well-coiffed Instagram posts about outfits, grains bowls and kitchen remodels. Who are you? How are you? Really? 

We’re all so busy and we’ve gotten so caught up in pretending we live perfect lives that we’re losing our ability to be real with each other. It seems harder than ever to say we’re lonely, isolated, afraid or angry. We lash out at each other over politics and policies instead of remembering that it’s people who matter.

I want us to really be neighbors and build genuine communities. 

Not neighbors as in “living next door to each other.” Neighbors who know, need and help each other and offer each other kindness.

Not communities as in online platforms and tools or the name we give to the places we live. Communities of people who know, care for and have fellowship with each other. Communities of people willing to do the hard work to get in the trenches and solve our messy problems together.

“I pin my hopes to quiet processes and small circles, in which vital and transforming events take place.”

Quaker Mystic Rufus Jones

Like Rufus, that’s where I’m placing my hope as well. In families. Among neighbors. In communities. Small circles coming together. Knowing each other and being fully known. Then deciding not just to do differently but to be different. I want to do the messy work of making all of our communities better. Together.

We can come together by building together. And together we can change the world. 

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